So Step One found you moving on up to the place where we all belong – the top of our list!

And Step Two found you scribbling little love notes to yourself. Keep them coming. And maybe write one for your partner, spouse, child, friend, co-worker, neighbor, etc. You get the idea. Expand the love out to the universe. Write it down and let the love continue to flow. Who knows the Nobel Prize for Love could be yours one day! Right after I receive mine.

Step Three will get you off the furniture and exercising your right to be fit and trim.  

Step Three: Shake it. Move it. Walk it off. Work up a sweat. Get your body moving and grooving.  The reports just came out we as a nation are becoming heavier and less fit. Colorado was the only state to have the least number of obese people but it is an alarming 18.9%.  In 1991 not one state had an obsess rate higher than 20 %.( Trust for America’s Health Report). Yikes!

I have a confession to make. I have been a bit of a slacker in the area of Step Three. But I promise to do better.  I do. I promise.

Start slow, but get off that sofa and put the Ding Dong down.  It all comes down to loving yourself enough to gift yourself with some extra years to be with your loved ones. So join a gym, get a buddy to go walking and lift some weights. Put the fork down after one serving and drink your water. If it doesn’t make a difference in your life, don’t eat it. If you would kill for it then I would say have two spoonfuls and then put it away. A little more savoring means a little less laboring at the gym.

I got a pedometer strapped to me and from the looks of it, my yellow lab and I have a date to walk another 2,000 steps right after dinner. Of course, we will have to stop every two feet. I have no idea what she is sniffing at (yes, I do) and I really don’t ask too many questions. I’m just gonna walk.  My butt off.

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Step Two: We are still working on you. Becoming first does not happen overnight, but practice becomes reality with a little more work.  We are coming to the part of the dreaded homework assignment. I am out of school, you are thinking, and my diploma is hanging on the wall. We are never too old to learn something new. Your family and coworkers will admire and respect you even more. If that is possible.

Get a pen (pencils are still for sissies) and a journal, or a bunch of index cards or use the backside of your grocery bill and…write every day.  Find five minutes and write positive affirmations. Index cards are great because you can put them everywhere. Grocery bill receipts may not be pretty, but put your affirmations on the fridge or any place else where you know you will be visiting more than once a day. And read them. And say them out loud with conviction. No positive thought is too small or too big. Open up that journal and repeat after me, “I deserve all the best that life has to offer. I know by loving myself first that I can love my family and friends and dare I say it, myself, more everyday.” Nice plug for me, eh?

My affirmation this week is “I am prefect today. And tomorrow is looking even better.”  And I raise my voice with one brown and one black shoe on. Note to self:  Turn on a light in the morning, would ya?

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Once upon a time, people wrote letters, peeled a stamp off their tongues and recited a silent prayer that their words would make it across the world or across town. While man wrote on cave walls and woman doused their love letters in cheap perfume, it was inevitable that one day all that would come to pass.  In its wake would arise communicating in a nanosecond with your friends, family and the world at large. I don’t know if you got the announcement but your computer gave birth to a weblog in 1998.   They call it blog for short. It’s a family name. 

Now for those of you (and you know who you are) who think blogging is for everyone else – think again. It used to be that Facebook was for 20 somethings, but now their parents and grandparents are taking over. There is power in numbers and in our words.  We’ve got to get hip and we’ve got to get on the wave of the future.

Below are some of the reasons why you should be blogging. Read them now.  You’ll blog us later.

From Annie:

1. First of all, we ole’ folks need to get on the wave.  We don’t want to be out of it or left back in the dust with the dinosaurs right? If you’re over forty or fifty in my case and you feel freaked out by blogging then I suggest you take a class, read a book, take a course or call me or Elizabeth. We’ll convince you that you can do it.  Blogging and social media are the hip tools of today.  Ok, so I know the word hip is dating me but how about this – it’s cool to be a blogger.  Listen if we can do it, so can you.  While you’re at it get rid of the out-of-date platform shoes in your closet (for women) and (for men) dump the old leisure suit that you’re never going to wear.  If you’re going to blog, you at least need to look decent.

2. You want to get your message out to the world right?  Well then this is simply the best way to do it.  Enough said.

2 ½. It’s fun.  Believe it or not, once you get over the hump, it’s actually enjoyable  :>)

From elizabeth:

3. We all have thoughts and opinions on what is going on in our lives, our neighbor’s   lives and the world at large. So let us know how global warming, mixing plaids with stripes or how the political scene is shaping up or destroying your world. Pick a subject that keeps you up at night and blog about it. When you write with passion, the world will beat a path to your door. Okay, they may knock at first, but people will come back for more when you tell us what you think, why you think it and how you plan on enlightening us in the future. Not a heavy  thinker and  have been known to crack a joke or two at the wrong time – like science class or in the middle of performing an emergency appendectomy? Then write a blog that will make people laugh and let your readers stumble upon it, follow or share it, tweet it with everyone they know.  Just write your blog as if the world depended on your voice getting out there.  And some days, you never know, it just might.

4. You are blogging up a storm and you are getting a following without starting a cult.  It feels great to have people clinging to your every word and your mother is thrilled to see how many people are leaving comments. But you just keep blogging and you forget to respond to the people who take the time to praise or scorn you. You remind us of those guys who promised to call but never did. After a while, you just start to fade from their collective memories and you are blogging to yourself. Do take the time to respond to those who take the time to let you know that you impacted their lives. Start a conversation and give people a platform to be heard.  More than likely someone will say something brilliant and viola’ – you got yourself a new blog.

Annie Hart, NLP Trainer, Ericksonian Hypnotherapist and Storyteller Extraordinaire, helps individuals and businesses to harness the power of change through story. She is fun, funny, fiery and out of the box. Annie believes that Stories Change the World and she can be found wildly and passionately blogging at: www.anniehart.com.

elizabeth cassidy, certified life and career coach for women who are looking to reach and surpass their dreams, is the founder of Branching Out Life Coaching. She is the Co-Creator/Founder of Coaches on the Edge – a blog that mixes wit and wisdom with life coaching. Along with her blogging partner, Laurie Lawson, they are national bloggers for Skirt! and their blogs have been featured on USA Today.com, Daylife.com, Treehugger.com and The India Times. You can read elizabeth’s own thought provoking and amusing blogs at Branchingoutlifecoaching

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How many of you slipped in behind the steering wheel of your parents’ car for the first time and just drove away? Okay, maybe a few of you. But how many of you ended up denting a fender and then had a lot of explaining to do? How many of you sat down in the first grade and wrote a best selling novel? I’d like to say that I did, but back then I didn’t know a B from a Q.

So how do you get there – from driving cross country to dipping your big toe into the Pacific or autographing copies of your first book for a long line of adoring book enthusiasts?

With all you have to do on a daily basis, you need to be inventive and steal a few minutes each day that you can claim for your very own. Seems like not enough time to even bother working towards a new goal or fulfilling a long held dream? Well, I beg to differ.

Start small. Finish big. That’s it.

Since I am obligated to finish this article, I will continue.

When you think about what would make your life have more meaning, does the big picture make you shake uncontrollably? Are you working or still raising a family or both, but would love to take that dream about becoming a portrait photographer, a potter or a politician and bring it closer to a reality? Would you love to have more room in your life by removing years of junk that is taking over your closets and drawers and driving you to distraction? Start small. Finish big.

1) Give yourself a deadline. I had a client who wanted to clear out years of papers that had been making her bedroom a fire hazard. I asked her if she could devote 5 minutes over the weekend to go thru some of the papers. She made a face at me when I suggested only 5 minutes, but agreed to it. We spoke the following week and she ending up giving herself 15 minutes and threw out 3 bags of items that no longer had room in her life. She started small and exceeded her goal. And she decided to keep giving herself permission to allow more into her life by getting rid of things that were taking up her space. Start small. Finish big.

2) Take 15 minutes for yourself. Yes, you can. Your dreams are calling and they would like an answer. In fifteen minutes, you could Google art schools in your area that offer photography course. Ask them for the names of advisors that you could talk to. You could call local art galleries and find out how to put together a show of your pottery. Start making it real. You could look up politicians in your area and call them about how you could volunteer in the community. Get that momentum going. Start small. Finish big.

3) Give your goals a safety net and watch what happens. Don’t abandon what you love to do or need to do because of time. So many other people found the time and achieved their goals. So why not you? You deserve it. Look for supportive people who will encourage you to move ahead. Steer clear of the negative people – they are the dream killers. Actually, they are scared to shake things up, but are probably envious of your spirit. We need dreamers who reach their goals to inspire us all. Do it for us. Start small. Finish big, It’s that simple. Now get out there and give me 15!

If you have tried the, “Start Small. Finish Big” theory, please leave a comment and let us know about your successes and challenges. You could be someone’s inspiration. Imagine that.

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Back in the good and not so old days, I spent my days working in the advertising and fashion world, I saw plays, I listened to music in Central Park while picnicking by candlelight, went bar hopping and bed hopping, worked for peace, performed as a stand up comic, hopped into a few more beds and in general was a city girl who took advantage of life and some of those “I am just not that into you but i will sleep with you” men. Silly men, I was not into them either. Ah, can’t wait to forward this blog to my mother.

So where the hell am I going with this? Nowadays I work in my home office trying to build up my coaching business, writing a best seller(got to be positive), playing with my 5 cats (which generally means tyring to get them off the keyboard and away from the screen), and stuff like that. For about 10- 12 hours a day and sometimes is happens 7 days a week. Where did I go?

At the end of the night I am beat and miss my old life. All of it. So what does this former wild child do? She watches Bravo and some of those absolutely dreadful reality shows.  This funky east village girl is glued to these sucky shows like a small mouse is stuck to sticky glue pad. Both are wrong on so many levels.

The one that horrifies me beyond reason and logic is those housewives shows. You know what I am talking about? If not, then there is still time to get to NYC this summer with a crystal candelabra and a bottle of fine wine in hand and get thee to Central Park!

Last  season a  dumb and spiteful blond  got another dumber blond so drunk at a party and the former blond’s son tried to bed her. Oh, you have got to be so proud of yourself! And this is while the later dumb blond’s rich boyfriend lied dying in the hospital. And you know how the former blond bitch was rewarded for such bad behavior? Her husband bought her a tennis bracelet for 35 grand.  Remind me to run over my neighbor. There’s got to be a choker with my name on it. Diamond encrusted no doubt.

I wish I could say that  I take out War and Peace to lull me to sleep. But I have to go back each week. I pray for major earthquakes to hit those houses in Orange County. I just don’t get why these women are allowed to breathe.

One has a son with a major, major drug problem so she has a wedding that made the stimulus program seem like chump change.

And their breasts! Nobody has breasts like that and most of them look so unappealing – like Stongehege, but not that pretty.

The next generation is so damn scary. No ambition, no drive except for maybe 2 of them and one wanted to join the army so she could get away from her mother. I don’t blame her. I’ll drive her to Afghanistan myself!

Now the west coast is over and next week it is the east coast. This group makes my skin crawl. Most of them slept their way to a penthouse in the sky. And none of them seem to appreciate it – they feel so damn entitled.  I feel they deserve to lose it all. And just because you marry someone with a title does not make you any better than any one else. How dare you? How bloody dare you? You ain’t all that sister!

I am appalled by my lack of common sense and even more appalled by the network’s lack of good taste.

If this is what the future generation is going to look like, then I should have frozen my eggs.

And I will do that right after I get back from Betty Ford. I hear they have a detox program for reality bites shows.

Greetings from Betty Ford. Wish I was there!

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The words I am writing about are words in our vernacular that are thrown around on a daily basis. And when I hear them, something in my brain goes, “STOP!! There ought to be a law.”

Without further ado, here are words to avoid if you are within 50 miles of me.

Succulent – I feel slimy just typing in this word. If someone says that something is that revolting word –  I feel my stomach acids start to kick in and a list of profanities slip through my lips. Who are the people who made up these words? And why are they not in jail? I remember years ago hearing about a succulent pig.  I threw up. And I felt so bad for the pig’s family. Don’t use that words around me. Please. It contains the word “Lent” in it so any of you are observing Lent add this to things not to do. Let’s just make it for 40 years instead of days. I will be dead by then.

Gorgeous – this word never made it to George Carlin’s list of words that cannot be said on TV, but since George is no longer with us,  I would like to add that word. I am willing to let the f bomb be said during the nightly news ( where it rightly belongs when talking about the economy)over the G word.  Nobody can say that word without the tiny hairs inside my ears spontaneously combusting. It’s not pretty and it hurts me. Deeply.

Delicious – Now this used to be an acceptable word until human beings  became delicious or the shirt I was wearing became delicious. What the hell? Delicious is about the world of food. The cake was delicious, the chicken was delicious but for God’s sake, Aunt Betty is not delicious. And I will not be party to such a cannibalistic act. Put the knife down won’t  you? If I hear someone say that so and so looks delicious, I just might put a lobster bib on them and watch. Dig in.

Yummy – Grow up. Get a thesaurus. (unless, of course, it is really yummy.)

I need to get a life, so I will list some other words that you really should steer clear from saying in my zip code.  If you have an urge to say them just bite down on your tongue. Hard.

Paradigm, plethora (sounds like a tile for a Hitchcock movie) and the new biggie – transparent.

I think  I have been very clear (or is that transparent ) on my request to not say those words around me.

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When I stand up for
those I love,
they call me a
bitch.

When I speak my mind, think my own thoughts
or do things my own way, they call me a
bitch.

Being abitch
means I won’t
compromise what’s
in my heart.
It means I live my life MYway.
It means I won’t allow anyone to step on me.

When I refuse to
tolerate injustice and
speak against it, I am
defined as a
bitch.

The same thing happens when I take time for
myself instead of being everyone’s maid, or when I act a little selfish.

It means I have the courage and strength to allow myself to be who I truly am and won’t become anyone else’s idea of what they think I ’should’ be.
I am outspoken, opinionated and determined. I want what I want and there is nothing wrong with that!
So try to stomp on me, just try to douse my inner flame, try to squash every ounce  of beauty I hold within me.
You won’t succeed.

And if that makes me abitch,so be it.
I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.

B – Babe
I – In
T – Total
C – Control of
H – Herself

B = Beautiful
I = Intelligent
T = Talented
C = Charming
H = Hell of a Woman

B = Beautiful
I = Individual
T = That
C = Can
H = Handle ‘anything’

        

I decided to take this 12 week blogging teleclass – what’s wrong with a little more info? In my world – that word is “plenty.” OMG- I feel my tiny little brain cells begging for mercy, asking for forgiveness if they think they trespassed against me and sleep becomes something my neighbors only do.

The first class I knew I was in trouble. Terms I have never heard before. Writing code and all this crap that you do behind the scenes. Plus, the class is 2 hours long on a Monday afternoon. Makes me wish for my old job at Doubleday. Hmmm..note to self: last boss was and still is a psycho that would scare the hell out of Norman Bates.

Does anyone ever feel like they can’t possibly take in any more info less their brains explode? I actually feel my temperature go up, my eyes dry up, my hair becomes dry and brittle and breaks off, I can’t lift my legs and I think my body weight goes up at least 10% – all for more info on blogging?

My teacher is brilliant, but I fear she may have me killed. Not like I would fault her for putting a contract out on me. I would. But, she is also so patient and does not talk down and actually does cheer you on- that you will get it. Yeah, right. Have you seen inside my brain lately? A sidebar- you know when your doctor is examining your eyes and he or she is not an eye doctor – well, ask them what they are looking at. Answer – it’s your brain.

My teacher is also from the south and my voice must crackle into her ear canal. This New Yorker, whose organs are sweating profusely, finds the soft tones almost soothing until I can’t add or delete some thing I cannot identify or what theme will work best for me. I told her bright red. I picked a peaceful, “zen” green and realized that I will more than likely change it again. There is a knock at my front door – it’s the hit man. Oh, he’s very polite. Must be those southern manners I hear about.

I did mention to her that I do blog for skirt! and she knows skirt!. she can go down the block and pick up a copy. I have mine flown in and delivered to my doorstep.

I have no idea where I am going with this blog, but maybe to say, “Thanks, Teach.” One day this stuff will make sense and then I will pass it on to someone else. Because my brain just can’t hold all this stuff.

        

Reality check: Well, have you ever had been in the middle of an electronics meltdown, experienced an iphone falling into a porcelain bowl of water or perhaps you played a vigorous game of Wii tennis and now you have a lot of explaining to do about the shattered extra, extra large screen (that ate your sofa, by the way)? I feel my blood pressure creeping up by just thinking about the next electrical torture device that will darken my mood and take up too much of my precious time.

Sometimes it seems that the world expects us to handle everything high tech without breaking a sweat. The whole idea of freeing up some time for ourselves comes with the electronic world at large thumbing their collective noses at us. More time for ourselves? I can’t even get off my computer. I have fallen into the hi-tech abyss and I can’t get out.

But, I have come up with an exciting new way for driving away from this high-tech stress highway. I am declaring that from this day on that the next time I say I have to turn something on …I will be talking about some sexy guy.

Hmmmm…I need to practice a little more. I just wrote this on my computer! Sorry, I got to turn you off now.